Wednesday, August 22, 2007

'Closing The Gap' Strategies

Are you having trouble making ends meet? Need a little extra cash in your pocket ?
Well here are two ways to make money immediately: 1) be a blueberry thief or 2) be a blueberry sheriff:

A blueberry processor is offering a reward for information leading to the culprits stealing blueberries right out of the fields.

While the thieves are raking it in, Cherryfield Foods placed an ad in a weekly newspaper offering a $5,000 reward to help get to the bottom of the thefts.

"I know for a fact that some private growers have reported a half-acre here and a half-acre there stolen," said Ragnar Kamp, general manager of Cherryfield Foods. "Another producer said someone had broken down a fence to steal berries."

August is the height of harvest season for Maine's blueberry industry as tens of millions of pounds of the berries are harvested from the blueberry barrens.

The first option means immediate money, but is high risk. If you get caught, you'll have a cash flow problem for many more months while you contemplate the errors of your ways in Alfred.

The second option doesn't pay out until the thief is successfully prosecuted, but $5,000 goes a long way and the chances of winding up in the state pen are reasonably slim.


weasel said...

This is my ticket to wealth, success, and not having to buy a house in Whitefield.

If I make it big in the world of blueberry law enforcement, I won't forget where I got my start.

mainelife said...

We're considering blueberry law enforcement as a way to pay for the new place. The way I figure, it's a third shift job, so I can keep the day job, and retired guy can join in as well.

Anonymous said...

Today the Pittsburgh news reported on growing pot in Maine and how drug enforcement is trying to find the crops before they are harvested so if you don't get caught that's an excellent way to make a little pin money.

weasel said...

Always has been- Sumner Purple is a classic homegrown circulator, and a very popular tactic up in my wife's home town of Bar Harbor was to go "hiking" in Acadia National Park and "accidentally" plant a few seedlings off the beaten path.

I hasten to point out that, believe it or not, I don't touch the stuff (it makes people beyond boring). But if there's a market...

mainelife said...

Oh my goodness. Weasel, you need to write a little book about Maine stuff just like this.
Anon-thanks for the suggestion, but I think I'll stick to blueberry law enforcement. Not a big fan of the wacky tabacky and I surely hate jail.

fletch said...

I can see a novel here..The Blueberry Gang, or Butch Cassidy and the Blueberry Kid. I'll work on it. I guess the thieves have to sell their goods on the blue market.